The Art of Listening

'The Thinker'
'The Thinker'
'Sliced'

Contemplating the difference between networking and friendship, I wonder if, listening is a fundamental difference. I am not one for blowing my own trumpet but I would put listening high on my list of skills. Although, being silent whilst another person speaks does not always mean ‘good listening’.

I have become increasingly aware that having three male voices to listen to in my house, quite often all at the same time, I may add; I have developed an art of appearing to be listening whilst often thinking a million and one other things at the same time. Isn’t that what most of us do, really, if we are honest ?

It is quite rare I think for a man to be verbally descriptive about what happens in their day. However, even in his second language my husband vividly describes every detail of what happens in his eventful days. Which is fantastic. I can almost imagine I am was there with him. So, on his return from London the story he told me of the Debut Contemporary Exhibition opening was as colourful as his sculptures. It can be hard to concentrate and to properly listen, something I am not doing too well at the moment, but if we do we can reap the benefit.

Joel Kramer, “The Passionate Mind” describes ‘the art of listening’ brilliantly. I have often looked at this to remind me of how to take on board new information.

“Ordinarily what we do when we think we are listening is to take in the words, translate them into something we know or are familiar with,and then agree or disagree.

If the words fit our structures, our beliefs, the things we feel comfortable with, the things we know then the speaker is a wise man and we agree.

If the words do not please us, do not fit our structures and beliefs, do not give us pleasure, then the speaker is a fool and we disagree.

That is what most of us do and call it listening.

But if we are either agreeing or disagreeing, then we are not listening.

For to listen there must be an openness, an innocence, a putting away of old ideas, so that possible the fresh can come in.

If you are busily involved in either agreeing or disagreeing, and you can watch yourself doing this by the way you nod your head as you listen, then what you are doing is not listening at all,

and the new, which is the fount of growth and learning, does not come in.

Networking

'plugged in'

Fantastic images were taken at the opening but non belonging to me. This sketch I stumbled across just now and thought it very apt for today. Are we all ‘plugged in’?

Social Networking sounds like such a modern phenomenon and the 2010 film!, but traces go back to the ancient Greeks and it has also been written about in the 1800’s by sociologists and psychologists. I can’t find a great definition but to my mind it is very much like the computer definition. Substitute people for devices and it works quite well. “A computer network, often simply referred to as a’ network’, is a collection of hardware components and computers interconnected by communication channels that allow sharing of resources and information.Where at least one process in one device is able to send/receive data to/from at least one process residing in a remote device, then the two devices are said to be in a network.”

The event at Debut Contemporary was a huge success and for my husband it was very much about ‘Networking’. He made new contacts and ‘physically’ met people he had already ‘connected’ with through social networking. He gained confidence about his work and his sketchbook (another reason why I thought it appropriate to but in a sketch today).

I feel I have been ‘networking’ too, both in the very real world of ‘mother and toddlers’. Making connections between mums’.  Exploring the world of ‘blogging’ a little more. Discovering some art blogs and ‘networking’ with them a little. One artist  blogged about the Debut Contemporary party…and captured on camera my husband ‘networking’! See more pictures at her ‘artists blog’

In yet another connection; we are constantly listening to a CD in the car at the moment which my eldest loves. The song writer also has a blog who just happens to have written The Delinquent Blogger Beseeches The Court of Social Media… perhaps, it is not just artists who are connected in invisible webs.

What is the difference then between networking and simply making friends then? Perhaps networking is more like the computer, about ‘shared resources’, ‘sending each other data’. It can happen face to face but more often now ,when ‘plugged in’. Well, on that note, I’d better get back to the real world…….

Exhibiting

'In the gallery'

This isn’t the first exhibition in London but it feels as though it is more significant. We are hoping that something comes from it. We are hoping it is received well.

My husband has just left the house to take the train down to Notting Hill. Perhaps, it is because we don’t live in London that it seems a little more nerve-wracking for him. It is also so easy to build something up and so there is a concern we are doing the same again. How many pieces will they be exhibiting? Over dressed? Featured artists are already getting a spotlight?. Such is life, we want to clamber to the top like the newly sprouting flowers of spring pushing through the dirt to get a glimpse of the sunshine.

My husband has started to worry his work isn’t exciting enough. I remember, Hughes’ book ‘The shock of the new’ being the classic art handbook at school which I loved. I am hopeful, now, that there is a slow movement of shift away from, shock value. Perhaps, because I feel society has drifted so much it is shocking enough we need to reintroduce some values, ideals and genuine talent.

Walls and Webs

The big step forward'

Ever get that feeling that someone has read your mind? Are we all connected by some invisible thread weaving us together?

The world-wide web connects us in so many ways. For my husband, Facebook is like a meeting place for artists. The old greats would meet in some Parisian coffee shop or art expose. Much cooler and artisan, in my opinion. Today’s modern equivalent is the internet. The terminology and ‘speak’ that goes hand in hand is amusing and somewhat confusing to those who are not ‘plugged in’. “Get off my wall” one teenage said to another as they sat next to each other with phones in hand.

I don’t completely understand the difference, but my husband now has a public Facebook page. So take a look at my husbands ‘WALL’. We haven’t ventured into the world of bird speak . Perhaps, that’s yet to come. Although, I am a little more apprehensive about twittering. On his return from London we have made some improvements to his website too www.samshendi.co.uk .

Considering we live in small village in North Yorkshire my husband has a strange way of being very ‘in vogue’. Last year he painted our showroom in vibrant greens which was, a colour which was few months later, ‘on trend’.

‘The big step forward’, a beautiful bronze piece has come alive since being professionally photographed and is symbolic of the stage we are in at the moment.  His practice has moved on from the kind of pieces above and has found himself again in the middle of what magazines are suggesting is in fashion.

I wonder if there is some subliminal connection between creative types, their thought process and ideas. In the world of fashion (London fashion week this week) it is all researched and analysed to predict forward trends…still not quite sure how they do that! Perhaps, there is some hidden webs tangling the talented together.

Spring into colour

'Pregnant'Spring is nearly here…isn’t it??

Sculptural-ly we have entered the colour phase and it has given the works a face lift. Brightened them, made them more appealing, friendly. Waiting for spring to do the same for me….

There has really been a developmental progress to these works and finally I think we are finding a ‘brand’ so to speak. Tomorrow my husband heads down to London (again!) for the first of many of his mentoring sessions at Debut Contemporary.  Exhibition coming up in spring when they celebrate their first birthday. Lots to brighten us up!

Awakening

'Mother and child'

 2012 so far has been a little sleep deprived. I think colds, teeth and just general comfort are the main reasons my baby keeps ‘waking up’ at the moment. For me it is on top of 17 months of sleepless nights so it is starting to take its toll. However, I know this whole period doesn’t last long and I am sensing already a ‘waking up’ from the comatose state of baby days. As the baby grows into a toddler it also feels like a ‘waking up’, so much more active. Walking, babbling, playing..less sleeping during the day! Their senses awakening to the world around them.

I was heartened to read two articles recently which confirmed my own method of sleep and motherhood. It is amazing how just another person agreeing with you gives you the confidence to feel stronger in your own stand point.  I was lacking that confidence due to the fact that I am very aware that in a western society the idea of co-sleeping with your infant is ‘not the done thing’. We are programmed some how through media and community to put the baby in a crib and then a cot in the nursery. Affected by my maternity in Egypt both my boys have slept in my bed. It has been so much easier for a variety of reasons, if not simple due to lack of space, but also I have found dragging myself out of bed so much more tiring as it ‘wakes you up’.

Despite the recent snow and ice there are subtle signs of spring. Life is also waking up slowly as the crisp winter mornings are un-curling into sunnier spring afternoons. We continue to have awakenings throughout life, we have to be ready to unfold into them.

'Mother and child'
'Mother and child'

Euphoria

To follow-up Monday’s interview and my french translation entry on Debut, ‘Euphoria’ comes from Ancient Greek. Technically, euphoria is an affect, but the term is often used to define an emotion as, an ‘intense state of transcendent happiness combined with an overwhelming sense of contentment’. It has also been defined as an “affective state of exaggerated well-being or elation.” (Wikipedia).I have just jumped up and down for 10 minutes making a strange kind of squeaking noise I didn’t know I had inside me, whilst my husband rang me to tell me that he had been SELECTED!!!! We are both in a Euphoric state. My husband said he wanted to leave everything at the shop and literally run home. His euphoric energy would probably only get him a few yards before his body told him the reality. However, he had to stay and see a customer. The word derives from Greek εὐφορία, “power of enduring easily, fertility”. So this sketch embodies exactly that.

Also, in Egypt they celebrate a year on from the revolution. My sister-in-law seems quite euphoric about the future for her children.  I must find out more from friends and family over there. It is also a close friends birthday. Happy Day! Euphoric Day in fact.

Debut

'Wire sculpture'

The word ‘debut’ comes from French début, meaning a performer’s first-time performance to the public.

It always makes me think of ballet. I saw Degas’ ballerina statue in Paris many years ago, was one of those pieces of art that you see images of but seeing the real thing was something again! I refer to that because my husband made a few wire sculptures, one of which was a ballet dancer. It was more like a 3D sketch really and one that got skipped. Funnily we then saw it placed on a rock a gate post in a field near our house. How it got there and why I have no idea. As I write, in that very strange ‘real time’  my husband is walking into a gallery in Notting Hill called Debut Contemporary. I, myself am a little anxious in anticipation. I am almost baffled as to how to describe my husbands anxiety over the last week. We are unsure what will come of it. He isn’t doing a performance but it is his first ever interview.

Debut is also a derivative of débuter (“to move, begin”). We are hoping it may be a new beginning of something.

dé- + but (“mark, goal”), from Old French but (“aim, goal, end, target”)

I guess the target or aim is for a platform for my husbands work to be ‘noticed’ for him to make connections and get more gallery space. We are very much of the mind-set what will be will be (maktub) but I am nervously waiting for a phone call later on to find out what will happen next…..